Kate: Mommy, why is Jesus wearing a skirt.
Mom: That is not a skirt that's called a loin cloth.
Kate: That is a skirt!
When we were home, Kate was holding a crucifix and I overheard this bit of conversation:
Thank you Jesus for your Precious Blood. Thank you for dying on the Cross for me. Thank you for ending [mass] so that we could go get donuts.
I'm so glad we're getting the point across. :)
Wow! We don't tell our kids anything about death, let alone God dying because of our sins!! For starters, I have no idea what I'd say about it, but also there is pretty conclusive evidence that kids can't understand the concept until they are much older. Isn't it better to stick with "Jesus loves you" while they are young (and hopefully) still innocent? Also, what does a two year old know about sin and blood as expiation for sin??
ReplyDeleteMaybe this a philosophical difference, but I hope you'll comment. Maybe it is better to tell them everything up front, but I'm personally a fan of trying to preserve their precious innocence as long as possible.
This is THE central mystery of our faith. It does not rob our children of innocence. It is The Good News! God loved us so much that He became man and through His passion, death and resurrection we have eternal life! We must ponder these mysteries, thank God and glorify Him for them. If we merely say, "Jesus loves you," until the age of reason we rob our children of the handing down of the faith.
ReplyDeleteCanon Law states: The administration of the Most Holy Eucharist to children requires that they have sufficient knowledge and careful preparation so that they understand the mystery of Christ according to their capacity and are able to receive the body of Christ with faith and devotion. (CIC 913 §1) It is our duty as parents and god parents to start preparing our children by bringing them up in the faith from the time of their birth.
This is not to say that this passing on the faith is heavy-handed, gloomy or conceptually intricate. Kate knows about Jesus' Precious Blood because we talk about the Eucharist at home and during Mass. She knows about Jesus' death on the cross because we have crucifixes all over the house. Often, she takes one down and plays with it/ talks to it. Of course she notices that Jesus has "owees" and we explain, very openly and very simply, that Jesus has owees because he died on the cross for you. Even though she is not able to fully conceptualize this, we plant seeds and, slowly, we enter more deeply into this mystery.
It is my opinion that by three years of age, children should know their basic prayers, some of which include the concept of death. The "Hail Mary" & "Angel of God" are a few of these. Some include the concepts of sin and evil "Eternal Father" & "Our Father". As a family, it is right to pray a rosary together every night. This will include teaching your children to meditate on the sorrowful mysteries. Although they may not fully understand them or their implications, catechesis happens slowly and from the very beginning of life. As a child of five, I can remember having a very intimate connection with the Passion of Christ. I think in some ways I was more connected to its meaning then than I am now.
As far as preserving our children's innocence, I agree, this is of the utmost importance. We do this by shielding their precious eyes and ears from immorality, harm, and evil not by shielding them from the central mystery of our faith.
I think we just disagree about what is a "seed" and what is a more mature plant!
ReplyDeleteOf course we must raise our children in the Faith--our question is: what is this for a 2 or 3 year old? For me, death, the Fall, sin, the passion, and resurrection will come later, when it makes sense. For now, it is simple and short prayer together as a family, familiarity with the Mass and Jesus, familiarity with Church and with our priests as a place of joy and friendships, and basic Bible stories and saint stories that are kid friendly. We do not have crucifixes in the kids' rooms; we have a cross with Jesus hugging children and a plaque of St. Francis and all of his animal friends. For now we stress God's love and care for us, but we don't explain yet why we so badly need it. S and G know the need for love and care--they feel it daily. But they do not yet know the need for redemption yet, and that is because they are still innocent. I do not believe that I rob them of anything by changing this.
I also think your childhood experiences were obviously very different from mine, in many ways. I really had a very carefree and simple early childhood, but even then I still remember the first time I thought about death, and I remember it being a kind of shattering of innocence and a loss of it (as it must be; whether we are explicitly aware of the doctrine of the Fall--and I was not--recognition of death is our consciousness of our own participation in it). I was pretty devastated once I figured it out--I think I must have been 5 or 6. And when my own kids figure it out they will have a theology of Hope to comfort them. But I see no reason to give them that knowledge before they really need it.
BTW: When Kate becomes a sister of mercy and my kids become neo-pagans, you can feel free to say I told you so!
ReplyDeleteAnd you know I think you are a great Mom!! I am just more sheepish than you about some things...
Jennifer Frey,
ReplyDeleteBy ignoring the point of the original post, and instead commenting on its presuppositions, you made it clear that your intent was chiefly to criticize BBullio.
That this is your intention is made all the more clear by your parting comment in that post, which implies that in your view, BBullio isn't a fan of preserving kids' "precious innocence."
Several other details (for example, your use of the exclamation "wow" as a summary of your response to BBullio's post, and your use of the phrase "isn't it better to...?") support this reading.
You claim to think BBullio is a great Mom. But almost every bit of what you have to say in this thread serves to undermine that claim.
-A friend of a friend of a friend, just happening to pass through here.
I love hearing the little things children come up with! Kate is so adorable! Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteI'm laughing so hard right now!
ReplyDeleteThat Kate- she is one fun and sassy gal! She and Luke are the cutest!
ReplyDeleteI think that death is as much a part of our life story as it is Christ's. To make death "scary" and something to be feared is to forget that it is in death, we find new life. BBullio, I think it is sweet that your kids know of the precious blood of Jesus-that there is someone who loves them so unconditionally. You obviously are teaching your kids in an age appropriate manner. I think it is great that your kids have an awareness of Christ as much as others have an awareness of Barney and the Wiggles. What better lifelong friend than Jesus who loved us so much that he died for us-sinners and screwups. Might as well learn from an early age just how much Jesus loves each of us. If you have love in your heart, you will parent in the best way. Good luck as a mother and keep letting your child know that Jesus loves her.
ReplyDelete